At the Dinner Table---Over a Plate of Spaghetti

"Dear God,
Thank you for my food.
I love you, God.
And thank you for baby carter too.
Amen."


-From the words of Hailey, my precious 4-year old sister.


Thank you, God for her innocence...
And thank you for her memory. I pray she never forgets Carter's abbreviated life.
I thank you that she remembers the way "i share with him and hold him and tickles him and he laughs" [her own words].
I thank you that she doesnt understand the intensity of what has really happened to us. I thank you that, when she says that she wants to go play with Carter and "be died" too, she doesnt really mean it or even comprehend what that really means.

I thank you that you are holding her in your arms.
And that you are in control.

Please help me to remember that-even when i feel like im at rock bottom.
Help me to trust you.
Help me come back...